Floyd the Cthuli of Oz

Floyd the Cthuli of Oz
Click on Floyd to purchase a copy of The Martian Invasion of Oz

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Jenny Everywhere In Oz - edited version

Jenny Everywhere In Oz
By
Kass Stone
The character of Jenny Everywhere is available for use by anyone, with only one condition. This paragraph must be included in any publication involving Jenny Everywhere, in order that others may use this property as they wish. All rights reversed.

The big semi-truck slid sideways up the highway with its breaks and tires screeching. The vehicle became a blur of moving parts and noise before taking the form of a three- story tall robot. Jenny pulled herself off of the pavement and ran between the feet of the mechanical, alien warrior just as its arch-nemesis came crashing down from the air. Where Jenny once stood was now another giant, extraterrestrial robotic warrior. The newcomer let out a metallic laugh and shot the semi-truck android in the chest with a blast from its laser cannon.
“This is not as fun as it looked on TV,” grumbled Jenny as she closed her eyes and focused on the pulsating rhythms of the multiverse.
A robot soldier/VW Bug exploded into a million pieces just a few yards to Jenny’s right. Chunks of smoldering metal and rubber rained down. A gateway appeared in Jenny’s mind and she focused. A flaming tire came hurtling down towards her. The gateway opened and Jenny “shifted” through it.
***
Sparks rained down as Jenny shifted into the new reality. A spark fell between the folds of her scarf. She screamed and slapped at the burn, hoping to prevent the scarf from going up in flames. Red laser beams flew overhead. She fell to her stomach, pulled the aviator goggles from on top of her head and snapped them over her eyes.
More soldiers! This time dressed in white and black body armor. The white soldiers fired large laser rifles and appeared to make steady progress up the corridor they were fighting in. Jenny rolled out of the way and pressed herself up against the metal wall. A panel just above her head flashed instructions in an alien language.
Coming up the opposite end of the corridor were skinny, bird-like robots firing away with their own large laser rifles.
“Ugh, more gun loving robots,” groaned Jenny and immediately began focusing on new pathways.
Green and red lasers filled the air. Every now and then the zapping, shrieking sounds of the guns would be punctuated by a scream. Another doorway opened up and she went through.

***
Jenny ran her fingers through her short, spiky hair and sighed. She slipped the goggles back to their place atop her head and wiped the sweat from her brow.
“I’ve got to start picking better universes to visit. I’m tired of all this gunplay,” mumbled Jenny as she pulled herself off of the packed dirt floor.
A quick examination of her surroundings confirmed that the room she was in was part of a series of caverns. On the walls hung heavy tapestries depicting witches and wizards huddled over cauldrons, summoning demons and all sorts of other magical business. There were bookshelves creaking under the weight of thick, heavy tomes. Tables laden with gurgling vials and mysterious looking jars cluttered the place while a black cauldron hung in a rough hewn fireplace.
On the far side of the room was a large aquarium filled with blue tinged water. Swimming back and forth in the tank was a big, pink brain. The brain propelled itself by moving the stem hanging from its base back and forth like a fish’s tail.
Jenny walked over to the tank and tapped on the glass with a rough, chipped fingernail. The brain darted away from her side of the tank. She examined the nails on her hands. The black fingernail polish she put on back when she was visiting the Green Lama had almost completely vanished.
“See something you like?,” asked a hissing voice from behind her.
Jenny made to turn in order to face the speaker but a hard blow to the side of her head sent the Shifter unconscious to the floor.

A strange sensation brought Jenny to. A rough, wet tongue was licking her knee through the hole in her black tights. She opened her eyes and saw that the tongue belonged to a large, frightening looking beast with the head of a tiger and body of a bear. Jenny was suspended above the floor in a cramped metal cage and the animal was standing on its hind legs to reach her.
“Are you making friends or are you hungry?,” the girl asked the animal.
A chorus of growls from a half dozen other tiger-headed, bear-bodied creatures answered the question for her. Jenny tried to raise herself up but was stuck in a kneeling, bent over position due to the tight dimensions of the pen she was trapped in.
The big animals circled below her. They were obviously looking forward to devouring her. It also sounded as if they were laughing.
“Hey, do you guys talk,” Jenny asked the creatures. “It’s no big deal. I’ve met plenty of talking animals in my travels.”
The largest of the animals quickly sat on his haunches and cleared his throat.
“Yes, we do talk and yes, we are planning on eating you,” the creature said. “We are the Crrrowwll Pack of Kalidahs in the service of the great liberator Mogo of the Southeast!”
“Kalidahs! You’re kalidahs,” Jenny shouted with sudden recognition. “This must be Oz! I love Oz. I was hoping I’d land here eventually.”
The kalidahs starred at her with blank eyes. The silence was broken by a hissing scream.
“Do not eat her yet! I need her. She is full of strange magic,” said a very tall blue skinned woman dressed in traditional witch garb of black frock dress, thick soled boots with narrow toes and tall, pointy black hat.
The woman would have been beautiful if not for the fact that she was missing a nose. She had only a pair of nostril slits which flared with rage as she stood in the entrance to the room. Orange eyes glared out from her face while a green tongue ran across thin, purple lips.
“Magic? What are you talking about, lady?,” demanded Jenny.
“Oh, you can’t hide your magic from me. I am Lady Mogo, the greatest sorceress in Oz. I studied under the Wicked Witch of the East herself and have spent the past decades in hiding, practicing my art and waiting to spring my vengeance on Glinda, Ozma and all of their allies,” said the witch.
“Look,” said Jenny, “I think it’s really cute and all. Really, I do. This out for vengeance plot with your cartoon animal goons and secret hideout is quite charming. It really is. The problem is that you guys never get away with this kind of thing and on top of that you are obviously stupid. What I’m capable of has nothing to do with magic.”
A rattling, shuttering sound, like old bones being blown across the desert, arose from Mogo. The kalidahs backed away and out of the room. The witch began trembling and streams of green and violet energy coursed about her hands.
Jenny began rocking the cage back and forth, causing it to swing on its chain. Mogo threw a crackling ball of energy at Jenny just as the cage reared away from the witch. The energy ball severed the chain. The cage crashed to the floor and Jenny was expelled through the locked door and out onto the packed dirt floor.
The Shifter bolted for the entrance. The witch chased after. Jenny reached into a hip pocket of her cargo skirt and pulled out a large, yellow egg. She tossed the egg in Mogo’s path as if it were a hand grenade. The egg split open and a long, writhing feline-headed dragon came exploding out of it.
Cat-Faced Dragons are hatched full size and furious. The gold and blue monster sprayed orange and yellow flames at Mogo. A shield materialized in the witch’s hand. Flames flicked along the edges of the shield and singed her fingers. The sorceress promised herself that she would personally choke the life out of Jenny with her bare hands.

Jenny ran as fast as she could out of the cave and through the thick wilderness waiting outside. Soon the sound of her Doc Martins pounding on the forest floor was louder than the battle between the witch and dragon.
She had the ability to shift out this reality when she felt like it, but the opportunity to save Oz from an actual wicked witch was too much for Jenny to resist. The idea that just around the next tree could be the Tin Woodwan or Scarecrow motivated her to run even when it felt as if her heart was about to burst in her chest.
After nearly twenty minutes of running, a road appeared. Jenny stopped at the roadside and struggled to regain her breath. Little dots of light floated in her vision as her heartbeat slowed and her lungs quit struggling. With her heart beat no longer sounding like a bass drum in her head, Jenny was able to hear the clop-clopping sound coming her way down the brick paved road.
What came trotting up the road made Jenny clap her hands in excitement. It was the Saw-Horse and riding on top of the roughly made wooden horse was none other than Jack Pumpkinhead himself. The stick man with the jack-o-lantern head waved at the beaming Jenny and The Saw-Horse came to a stop along side of her.
“Hello, stranger,” said Jack. “My pumpkin is getting kind of soft, but you look like you are not from around here.”
Jenny laughed and wrapped her arms around the Saw-Horse’s neck.
“Pretty friendly where you come from, eh?,” asked the Saw-Horse.
“You have to forgive me,” giggled a slightly star-struck Shifter. “My name is Jenny Everywhere. I’m from . . .”
“America,” interrupted Jack. “You sound a lot like Dorothy does and she is from America, though you don’t exactly look like her. You kind of resemble the Chinese people in the picture books of the rest of the world Dorothy has but you also look kind of like the Indians from America in the other book Dorothy showed me. Are you an Indian, Chinese or something else?”
“Yep,” said Jenny with a smile. “I can also travel from one world to the next just by thinking about it. I landed here in Oz at the lair of a wicked witch plotting to overthrow Ozma. We need to warn her and fast!”
“Well, if you want fast I can manage to go just as fast as you want,” said the Saw-Horse, with an obvious sense of pride. “Since I’m not made out of living stuff and just old wood, I never get tired. I might split a leg from time to time but nothing serious.”
“Great,” said Jenny, “but I have to ask you one quick favor before we go.”
Jenny pulled out her cell phone and told the pair to say cheese. This was no problem for Jack, since he always had a smile carved into his face. The Saw-Horse had only a rough gash for a mouth but managed to make his knotty eyes appear full of good humor. Once the picture was taken, Jenny hopped behind Jack on the wooden equine’s back. The Saw-Horse reared up on his back legs and then dashed off with a mighty leap. The girl could not contain her laughter as the Land of Oz whizzed past.
Just as Jenny and her new friends disappeared into the woods, Mogo emerged driving a chariot pulled by a team of a dozen kalidahs. The animals are excellent trackers and immediately picked up on Jenny’s scent. The witch snapped a long whip over their heads and sent the train of beasts racing after her.

After little more than an hour, the Saw-Horse came to a sudden halt, causing Jack to fly over his head and into a small pond. Jenny leapt off the horse’s back and helped Jack out of the pond. After she was certain he was once more steady on his feet, Jenny looked around her surroundings and discovered that they were in front of a large pink palace guarded by a large retinue of women soldiers.
“This is Glinda’s palace,” said the Saw-Horse. “She will know what to do when it comes to a wicked witch.”
Just as the Saw-Horse said this, the gates of the palace opened and at the head of a double row of gorgeous lady soldiers was a beautiful young woman. She had sparkling blue eyes, long red hair that fell about her shoulders in ringlets and wore a flowing, pink dress. This was Glinda, the Good Witch of the South.
“Greetings, Jenny Everywhere,” said Glinda. “I have been expecting you.”
“Really,” said a surprised Jenny. “You knew we were coming?”
“Oh, you have read all of the books Mr. Baum wrote about our faerie country. You should be quite aware that I have the Great Book of Records in my possession, which tells me everything that happens in Oz as soon as it occurs. Now, my precious Ms. Everywhere, we need to wait for Lady Mogo to appear. After she has been taken care of, we will have more time to chat,” said Glinda in a gentle, soothing voice.
Standing next to the beautiful and regal Glinda made Jenny feel under dressed in green boots, torn black tights, khaki cargo skirt, Ramones t-shirt and green hoodie. Just as she was about to comment on Glinda’s dress, Jack gave out a wail.
“Oh, no,” the pumpkin headed fellow shouted, pointing towards the road leading to Glinda’s palace.
Mogo was rushing towards the gate, snapping at the kalidahs with her whip and shouting at them to move faster. Glinda’s soldiers quickly formed a wall and thrust out their spears. The witch urged the team to go even faster. Just as the kalidahs were about to smash through the women, the soldiers parted and Mogo’s chariot rocketed straight into the palace.
As the chariot rushed past her, a claw-like lantern holder on its side caught hold of Jenny’s scarf. She was yanked off of her feet and flew through the air tethered to the chariot. Mogo looked over her shoulder and began to cackle madly. This caused her to not notice her team rushing into the great glowing square in the grand foyer of the palace.
The world around them went a dark blue. The Kalidahs stopped suddenly, causing the team to crash into each other, which sent the chariot sailing into the air. Jenny’s scarf pulled free from the chariot and she fell with a teeth rattling jolt on her behind. The chariot crashed and Mogo was tossed from it. The witch landed on top of the pile of groaning kalidahs.
Jenny rose unsteadily to her feet and saw numerous heavy, wooden doors materializing in the air above her. Mogo also made it to her feet and had transformed her hands into scaly talons with long, curling black claws. A pair of bat wings sprung from the center of her back and she flew at Jenny with her talons slashing violently through the air.
“You are going to die for forcing me to confront Glinda too soon,” squawked the witch.
Jenny braced herself and went into her best fighting stance. Her heart was racing but she could also not believe her luck to be facing down a witch in Oz. A ball of scintillating white energy slammed into Mogo’s side. The sorceress crashed into one of the room’s radiating blue walls with terrible force.
“Just in time, I would say, eh girls? What do you think, Mogo?,” asked a familiar voice from over head.
Jenny turned to look and was surprised to see that out all the doors that had materialized in the room emerged a different Glinda. They were all beautiful and all different. There were old, matronly Glindas and spunky teenaged Glindas. A fox-person Glinda floated on a magic carpet and a Black Glinda had a wreath of crystal spheres floating around her head. A morbidly obese Glinda sat in a winged throne that flew in great circles around the room.
Mogo rose to her feet. She was restored to her original appearance and had a look of complete terror on her face. She was surrounded by dozens of Glindas. Her team of kalidahs huddled together for a quick conference and then sped out of the strange blue space as fast as their tired legs could propel them. Mogo was alone.
“What kind of sorcery is this?,” demanded Mogo.
“You obviously are not used to dealing with the multiverse, are you?,” teased Jenny.
“Oh, don’t pick on the poor girl for having an incomplete education,” said the Glinda that greeted Jenny, Jack and the Saw-Horse when they first arrived.
“I was taught by the greatest witch in Oz,” protested Mogo, which caused all of the Glindas to twitter with laughter.
“Oh, you poor, delusional thing. You never got to the most important aspect of an education in our craft–the true nature of everything. It’s what makes all of what we call magic possible,” said a beaming Glinda-Prime, as Jenny now thought of her.
“This is insanity,” yelled Mogo, who now had tears in her eyes.
“No, this is the Legion of Glindas. We represent Glindas from across every reality and work from out of our Possibility Boxes to lend each other a hand,” said Glinda just as a pair of Glindas, one with a beard and one with a set of curling rams horns, brought a door on to the floor.
The door opened and out stepped a bent over, green skinned old witch dressed in the same costume as Mogo.
“Mistress,” shouted Mogo, who ran to the old hag and wrapped her in an embrace.
“Technically, not yet. In my reality, the witches known as wicked are the heroes fighting against the evil Wizard and his minions. My student, also named Mogo, was eaten by the Ferocious Lion. If you are interested, you can come with me and continue your education and perhaps provide an old woman some company,” said the old witch with a gnarly, gapped tooth smile.
Mogo began to sob and hugged the hag for all of her life.
“Can I bring my pet brain?,” asked Mogo.
“Of course, dearie, of course,” said the witch gently as she patted Mogo on the head.
The Legion of Glindas broke into applause. Jenny could not help it and joined in the applause as well.
One Month Later . . .
Jenny waved goodbye to her friends. Glinda presented her a back pack filled with photos of her travels through Oz. Jenny gave Ozma and Dorothy kisses on the cheek and then hugged Jack and Saw-Horse. She checked her hair in the polished, metal coverings of Tik-Tok the clockwork man and then waved farewell to everyone else.
“It’s been an amazing couple of weeks, guys, but I’ve got to go,” she shouted through cupped hands.
“Remember, Jenny Everywhere, no matter where you end up in life, you always have a home here with us in Oz. Pretty much all of the Lands of Oz are open to you. The Legion of Glindas have made sure you will be welcomed as a true friend no matter which version of our faerie land you end up in,” said Glinda while giving Jenny a hug.
Jenny thanked her and blew a kiss to the assorted Oz glitterati. She then focused, found a doorway and shifted.

***
Jenny found herself surrounded by tall pillars and the crumbling ramparts of an ancient castle. Wind blowing through the remains of the structure caused a lonesome moaning that sent a chill up her spine. About the ruins were the statues of kings and queens, knights and creatures like centaurs and satyrs.
“This place feels familiar,” said Jenny as she took a seat on a toppled pillar.
“Who are you?,” a young man’s voice demanded.
Jenny spun around and saw two boys and girls dressed in armor and carrying weapons staring down upon her from on top a crumbling staircase. A massive lion trotted up behind them. Jenny felt the lion’s eyes piercing through her. The creature had an air of undeniable authority and power. He was used to leading and inspiring. His was a power that was unquestionable and irresistible, at least according to him.
“Yeah, sorry, I’m not into holy wars! Later,” said Jenny and shifted out of there.

No comments:

Post a Comment